Skool

I’m in denial about it.  It’s painful to talk about.  I get weepy at the mention of it. 

Eva is going to Preschool in October.  It’s not an academically challenging curriculum but more of a craft/singing/playtime curriculum.  It’s at the high school and it’s an elective class that the students can take.  Even though it’s not really sending her to school, I feel a lot of anxiety that she’s old enough to attend.  She’s growing so incredibly quickly that I can’t breathe sometimes. 

The topic has been contentious at our house.  My spouse and I have differing opinions about preschool.  “She needs the socialization” (according to Michael).  “It will be good for her” (according to Michael).  “She will love it” (according to Michael).  “I need to curl up and cry” (according to me).

I’m trying to be brave about it.  I purchased her school supplies yesterday.  I felt shaky choosing out the crayons and glue sticks.  My eyes stung with tears as I perused the backpacks.  I felt betrayed.  I DON’T WANT MY BABY TO LEAVE ME.  EVER.

I hate school.  School sucks.