Conversations with a 4-year-old

In the bathroom:

Me: Eva, it’s time to take a shower.

Eva: I can’t.  Kitties hate water and I’m a kitty.

Dinnertime:

Me: Eva, come to dinner, please.

Eva: You can call me Dexter.

At Walgreens:

Eva: Let’s go look at the toys.

Me: Just a minute.  I’m looking at the cold medicine and then we’ll go look at the toys. 

Eva: (Wandering towards the toys with my shopping cart)  It’s okay, we can split up.

In the car headed to Fred Meyer:

Eva: If Playland is open, then I’ll go to Playland.  If it’s closed, then I’ll go with you and look at the toys.

Me: That sounds like a good plan.

Eva: Yeah, I just made it up.

Dinking around the house:

(Eva’s playing with her fishing pole and the magnet comes off the string.)

Me: I’ll glue that magnet back on for you in a minute.  Please don’t lose it.

Eva: Ok.

I look over to find Eva feeding the fishing pole line into the heating vent.

Me: Eva!  Did you drop the magnet down the heating vent?  We can’t get that back out.

Eva: Calm down, Mama.  It’s just a string.

Snuggling in bed:

Eva: Can I play on your phone?

Me: Not right now.

Eva: You've got to be kidding me!

Getting ready for bed:

Me: Eva, you’re getting to be a big girl now.  What do you think about not wearing a diaper to bed anymore? You can get up in the night and go pee in the potty instead.

Eva: (Pauses for a moment) I think I like peeing in my diaper.

Enough said.