Unwell

Congested? Check.

Headache? Check.

Sore Throat? Check.

Un-showered at 1:00 p.m.?  Check.

It’s the best day of Eva’s life.  I’ve hired a babysitter.  It’s called Sesame Street.

Don’t judge me.

Epic Success

This is going to be a long post.  Proceed at your own risk and feel free to skim.

Weigh-in can wait. Let’s talk about the relay.  How can I accurately describe the experience?  Exhausting.  Insane.  Exhilarating.  Fun.  It was, well, Epic.

I mentioned before that our team had 12 members.  We were split between 2 vans.  The women were in one and the men in the other.  We were each assigned a number that was our running order.  The women were runners 1-6 and the men were 7-12.  Each of our distances were different based on how the course was broken up and which number we were assigned.  I was runner number 4 and my position was ranked 7th in difficulty, with 1 being the most difficult and 12 the least.  I’m grateful that I had an easy assignment for my first experience.  We started with runner number 1 and worked our way through each of our legs.  After all 6 women had finished, we handed off to the men and were free to do whatever we wanted until they were done and ready to pass back to us.  There was a lot of time to sit around.  We talked and ate and shared secrets.

So let’s start at the beginning:

The most important thing I packed…the food.  We all brought snacks but my food was the most eaten.  Even the guys wanted my food.  Every time we met up with them, they asked for my snacks.  I was very flattered.  What can I say?  I know food.

 

Here I am all packed up and ready to go.

    

As it turned out, I had completely over packed.  I followed the suggested list but didn’t need most of the items.  It was annoying to dig through that darn duffel bag over and over again looking for stuff.

Mykey sent flowers and balloons on Thursday afternoon.  He expressed to me many times that he was proud of me for doing the race.  I really appreciated it. He was very supportive during my training and took over Saturday mornings for months so I could go out on long runs.  Michael was very integral to my success.

Here we are loading the van at 6:30 a.m. Friday.

If you're good at counting, you’ll see that our 6th female runner isn’t in the picture.  We picked her up on the way out of town.  

Our van arrived at the starting line around 8:00 a.m. while the men were able to sleep in and gather up last minute items we had forgotten.  They met us later in the day at the end of our first legs.  At 8:30, our first runner took off and the rest of us piled into the van and drove along her route to the end of the leg where the exchange would take place.  On the longer distances, we would wait at the halfway point to give water and encouragement.  On shorter distances, we just drove directly to the exchange point.  The active runner wore a reflective bracelet that was handed off to the next runner at the exchanges.

Here I am just before my first leg.  I was really nervous and felt a little sick to my stomach waiting for the handoff.  But it turned out very well. 

I started just before 11 a.m.  I began in Newberg and finished in St. Paul.  (Not Minnesota.)  The route was mostly flat with about a mile of incline.   Most of the route was running along the St. Paul highway so that was kind of scary.  The shoulder was small and there were a lot of semi trucks.  The force of the passing trucks would take my breath away.  My shirt flew up a couple of times and showed the other cars my post-baby gut, but I think the motorists enjoyed it.  Who doesn’t love a sweaty gut?  It had been cloudy for most of the morning but the sun came out right before I was starting.  The sun shone on me the entire time and I ended up with a sunburn on my face.  I was mad about that.  The details:

Total distance: 4.56 miles

Time: 42:02

Average: 9:18/mile

I was shocked when I finished and looked at my watch.   It was a great way to start!

After I handed the bracelet off, I stripped down in the van, wiped off with baby wipes, and put clean clothes on.  This was the routine after each leg. 

We met the guys around 12:30 p.m. when our last female runner handed the bracelet off to runner number 7.  We then had about 4 hours of downtime.  We had lunch and drove to the exchange point in Silverton where we would receive the handoff from the men.  The exchange point was at the high school so we laid our sleeping bags out on the lawn and sat around and talked.  It was really hot and there wasn’t much shade.  We ended up moving to the sidewalk under a tree after a while.  We took over from the men just shy of 5 p.m.

One of the teams was called The Michael Bolton Running Club.  They blasted Michael Bolton music from their van and had pictures of him plastered everywhere.  They had a cardboard cutout that they hauled around at each exchange.  We couldn’t resist getting a picture with Michael Bolton. 

Here I am gearing up for my 2nd run.  I was nervous again but for different reasons.  I could feel that my legs were a little stiff, and the sandwich I ate for lunch was sitting in my stomach like a lead weight.  But again, it turned out well.

I began my 2nd run around 8:00 p.m.  I started in Sublimity and finished in Stayton.  The sun was setting and the temperature had cooled down quite nicely.  It was a quick run and I was nearly finished by the time my team drove by.  They had overestimated how long it would take me.  The details:

Distance: 2.41 miles

Time: 21:22

Average: 8:54/mile

I haven't run that fast since high school!  The best part was that there was a woman right on my heels as we started out.  I could see her in the corner of my eye and she was making a move to pass me.  However, right then the shoulder ran out and she would have had to step into traffic to pass me.  It was also the beginning of an incline.  I started up the hill and within a few minutes, I had lost her.  All of my hill training paid off!  I was significantly ahead of her by the end.  In fact, our team left the exchange before she ever arrived.  I felt pretty good about that.  During this time that we were running our 2nd legs, the men went out to Mexican food and saw the new Tom Cruise movie.  They regretted it when they had to run in the middle of the night with burritos in their stomachs and no sleep.

We handed off to the bloated and tired men around 10:30 and drove to Corvallis to catch some sleep before it was our turn again.  Unfortunately, our navigator was too busy talking instead of navigating and we drove in the wrong direction for 10 minutes.  We didn’t arrive to the exchange point until 11:15 and it was nearly midnight by the time we had everything set up to sleep.

We didn’t sleep.  As I was laying on the cold ground at Corvallis High School I regretted agreeing to the relay.  There were a lot of lights illuminating the lawn, it was freezing and humid outside, and there was constant noise due to teams arriving to sleep.  I tossed and turned and slept for maybe an hour. 

 

I wanted to cry when the men called at 3:00 a.m. to say their last runner had just started his leg.  We rolled up our wet sleeping bags, put on our wet shoes, and waited for the guys to arrive.  We took over just before 4. 

I was feeling really nervous about my final leg.  I was exhausted and sore.  I shoved some trail mix down my throat, took a caffeine pill, and waited for my turn.  I hit the road around 5:45 a.m.  I started in Corvallis and finished in Peoria.  The details:

Distance: 7.36 miles

Time: 1:13:04

Average: 9:54/mile

It was amazing.  The sun was just starting to rise, the temperature was perfect, and I was running along a country road through farm land.  It was beautiful.  (Except for the dead cat I passed.  As I was running by, I had this irrational thought that it was going to jump up and claw my face off.  It didn’t.  It really was dead.)  My legs were sore through the entire run, but I never felt like I couldn’t make it.  I felt strong.  I felt proud.  I actually kind of felt like a real runner.  I contemplated how much I’ve accomplished over the past few months and enjoyed the victory.  It was really nice to have the quiet time to reflect.  And I passed another runner.  That made me feel pretty cool.

Here I am after the run.

I felt great for a while and then the stomach started churning.  Every time I do a long run, I get the most terrible stomachache.  It lasts for hours and I don’t appreciate it.  Once my stomach started hurting, I was ready to go home.

Here we are handing off to the men for the final time.

This is our entire team except for the one guy who was out running.  He was a bit offended we took the picture without him but it was our only chance to have everyone together.  Two of our women had to get home for their kid’s dance recital so I ended up heading out early with them.  I arrived home at 2:30 p.m. on Saturday afternoon.  I was stinky and exhausted. 

I ran a total of 14.33 miles.  I used porta-potties, I slept on the ground, I got naked in front of other women.  I laughed, I worried, I ran, I succeeded.  It was one of the best experiences of my life and I’m excited to do it again.

I deserve a medal after all of that.

Epic

I’m heading off to the Epic Relay on Friday morning.  I began training for this race in March and now it’s time to run.  I feel ready.  I’ve put in the hours and I’m ready. 

Our team has 12 runners: 6 men and 6 women.  We begin at 8:30 on Friday morning outside of Portland and will finish in Eugene sometime Saturday afternoon.  There will be someone from our team running during that entire time.  We will cover a total distance of 187.63 miles.  I’m pretty excited about it.

The distances of my assigned legs are 4.56 miles, 2.41 miles, and 7.36 miles.  I will be running them in that order.  My only concern is that my longest distance is my final leg.  If I get any sleep Friday night, it will be in a field somewhere.  I worry about aching joints and fatigue.  I also worry about having enough energy after eating only peanut butter and jelly sandwiches and Cheez-its.  And Sour Patch Kids.  I bought a giant bag of Sour Patch Kids.  They’ll probably be what saves me from exhaustion.

I’m looking forward to cementing friendships and enjoying girl time.  I’m looking forward to the accomplishment.  I’m looking forward to being done with my training schedule.  Running 4 days a week is a lot for a lazy person such as I.

I’m dreading the stench that will be following me around after running and not bathing.  I’m dreading the same stench from 5 other women in the van with me.  I’m dreading porta-potties and changing my clothes on the side of the road.  I’m really dreading sleeping on the ground.  More than anything else, I’m dreading sleeping on the ground.  I’m going to be mighty ugly by Saturday.  Good thing we’re bringing a video camera. 

Bring on the adventure.

Now, to all of my friends in Southeastern Idaho: there’s an Epic Relay that runs from Logan to Jackson Hole.  Don’t you want to get in on the action?    

Week 13

Did you think it was amazing that I gained 6 pounds in one week?  Maybe you thought it was appalling.  Are you impressed that I lost 6 pounds in one week?  Maybe you’re still appalled.  You’re so hard to please.   

Thanks to a combination of hard work and illness, I’m back on track.  It’s a good thing because I was on the edge of sanity for a few days there.  I’ve discovered through this process that my mood is directly related to the number I see on the scale in the morning.  My self-esteem is entangled too much with my weight, and I need to reconcile that.  It’s a dangerous mindset.  I’m finding now that even though I am really close to reaching my goal, I’m starting to obsess that I need to lose more weight.  I feel like I don’t look like I thought I would, and instead of being excited about my progress, I’m disappointed.  I need to appreciate what I’ve accomplished and stop looking for the greener grass.  It’s hard to stop focusing on my faults.  I'm trying to remind myself that 13 weeks ago, I dreamed of being the weight I am now.  Yet, somehow, I’m not satisfied.  That’s not healthy.  Time to look at fat pictures and savor the accomplishment.

Anyway, can you believe you’ve been listening to me babble about my weight for 3 months?  You need a hobby or something!

• Week 13: –5.8 lbs
• Week 12: +3.4 lbs
• Week 11: Bye, due to heavy denial.
• Week 10: –0.8 lbs
• Week 9: –1.0 lbs
• Week 8: –1.2 lbs
• Week 7: –0.4 lbs
• Week 6: –0.6 lbs
• Week 5: –1.2 lbs
• Week 4: –3.6 lbs
• Week 3: +0.8 lbs
• Week 2: –1.8 lbs
• Week 1: –2.2 lbs

Total weight loss: 14.4 lbs

Holy crap, man!  Less than 5 pounds to go!  Or is it grammatically correct to say fewer than 5 pounds to go?  Hmmm…   

Dinner for Two

While I was busy making dinner, Eva was busy having a picnic with yesterday’s popcorn.

She’s either expecting a guest, or she’s just a hog. 

My money is on the latter – she is my daughter after all.

The Love of a Good Man

My dear husband saw that I had a problem with water retention and he solved it. 

He brought home a stomach bug. 

I’m not retaining anything anymore. 

In fact, I pulled the sleep-on-the-bathroom-floor routine early this morning.  Michael got up to make his hundredth trip to the can and stumbled upon a lumpy mass huddled beneath a robe.  Like the gentleman that he is, he didn’t intrude on my toilet, but went down the hall to the other bathroom instead.  Chivalry lives on in our house.

The good news: Michael is feeling better and went to work this morning.  It’s a quick moving bug. 

The bad news: I have about 8 more hours to go. 

I sure appreciate that Michael is a problem-solver. 

Week 12

Insert naughty word here: _____!

I’m still suffering from serious weight-gain issues.  My body seems to think it’s time to retain water for the apocalypse.  I can store quarters in the valleys on my ankles when I remove my socks.  It’s enough to make me crazy.  (Just ask Michael.  Poor guy has had to deal with my ranting for two weeks now.)

I want to quit.  I feel like my goal has become unreachable and drifts farther away every time I get on the scale.  I’m frustrated.  I’m tired.  I’m puffy.

But I can’t quit.  Then I’ll just be a quitter.  No one likes a quitter.  I will have also wasted a lot of time.  And record-keeping. 

My patient husband gave me a pep talk last night and I’m mustering up the motivation to persevere.  I’m making a new progress chart to hang by the scale today.  Maybe I’ll put flowers and smiley faces on it.  Maybe I’ll put swear words and skulls.  I’m still deciding. 

• Week 12: +3.4
• Week 11: Bye, due to heavy denial.
• Week 10: –0.8 lbs
• Week 9: –1.0 lbs
• Week 8: –1.2 lbs
• Week 7: –0.4 lbs
• Week 6: –0.6 lbs
• Week 5: –1.2 lbs
• Week 4: –3.6 lbs
• Week 3: +0.8 lbs
• Week 2: –1.8 lbs
• Week 1: –2.2 lbs

Total weight loss: 8.6 lbs

I have a strong urge to throw my keyboard through the window right now.

Maintaining the Award

I'm hard at work keeping up with the requirements of my Parent of the Year award. 

I heard Eva coughing on the baby monitor last night and I thought I should get up and check on her.  However, I was so warm and comfy that I just laid there and listened for a minute.  She coughed a couple of times and then quickly quieted down, so I rolled on over and went back to sleep.  I had a great night's sleep.

This morning I opened Eva's bedroom door and was punched in the nose by the overwhelming and unmistakable scent of vomit.  Eva was standing at the edge of her crib smiling and stomping her feet with excitement that I was there.  Her shirt was covered in barf, as was her blanket and mattress.  I felt like the big jerk that I am.  The coughing was her throwing up and I was too lazy to get up and check on her.  Dangit!

I feel like a horse's patoot.  I'm obviously planning on keeping this award forever.   

Cal-ee-fornia

Like the schmuck that I am, I failed to take pictures while on our trip.  It never occurs to me in the moment to snap a photo, and then I always regret it later.  The one event I did photograph was the Sacramento Zoo but that's only because they had giraffes.

We went to visit Myke's sister, Christina and her husband, Chase after not seeing them for a few years – 2 since we saw Christina, 5 since we saw Chase.  How terrible!  (Our excuse: they just recently moved to California after living in a far away land called Wisconsin.  We never made the journey out there because we are jerks and nobody vacations to Wisconsin.  Hence, many seasons have passed since we’ve seen them.)  The really wonderful thing is that even though it’s been a while, we just picked up where we left off as if no time had passed at all.  That’s the true test of a good relationship.

Since a lot of our family reads this blog, I have to leave out the part where Chase and Christina bored us with their conversation and inflicted torture by forcing us to watch the movie Anchorman 2.  So I won’t say that.   

Instead, I will say that we had such a good time with them!  (Sincerely, we did.)  We didn’t do anything extravagant, but we were together and it was perfect.  My absolute favorite part was sitting around talking and catching up.  Chase grilled for us almost every night and we would sit in the backyard eating and talking in the warm air.  Exquisite.  (Sidebar: because of this delicious grilling, we bought a grill as soon as we returned home.  It’s a very exciting story that I will share later.)  As the week went on, I wished more and more that we lived right next door.  I would love to have Christina as my stay-at-home-mom bestie.  Come on, Christina, Oregon is nice…

So the zoo ended up being the most fun for the kids and adults.  It is a small zoo but the perfect size for little kids.  Right across the street is a place called Fairy Tale Town which was essentially a giant fairy tale-themed playground.  It really was a lot of fun.  Despite all the neat things to see, I was most excited about the giraffes, of course.  Eva was enthralled with the animals and it was cool to see her excitement.

I don’t know what it is about giraffes, but I love everything about them.  They are so cute.  I never get tired of looking at giraffes.

Eva was enamored with the zoo map because it had a picture of a lion on it.  She kept looking at it and saying, “Roar!”

I especially enjoy this shot:

At Fairy Tale Town, Eva loved sitting on the horses, which was a little weird since they were stationary.  She didn’t care though.  I think it’s because she recognizes them as horses and was happy to sit there neighing.

Incidentally, Fairy Tale Town has a monument in my honor.  I was very flattered and then demanded to know why I haven't been receiving a portion of ticket sales.  Someone is looking into it and will get back to me.  This cheese should be very wealthy soon.

It’s kind of hard to see, but the plaque says, “Cheese Stands Alone.”  If you don’t understand this reference, please feel free to educate yourself about my long-standing assignment as The Cheese.

It was a long day in the hot sun and before we even made it back onto the freeway, this is what happened to Eva:

That’s proof of a good day.

We did lots of fun things throughout the week but I have no pictures.  No sense in discussing those other events. 

Many, many thanks to Christina and Chase for being so gracious and opening up their home to us.  They even let us bring our dog!  The food was divine, the company was excellent, and we left being very grateful to have them as family.  We love you!

And now back to real life.  It kinda stinks.  (Except for our new grill…)

Week 11

I’m officially declaring this week a bye.  I’m the boss of me and that’s what I want to do.  I was expecting to have a gain on the scale this week; I was on vacation, I ate whatever I wanted, and I didn’t drink enough water.  However, I still went running 4 times and I figured that would give me a little leeway.  Unfortunately, I was painfully mistaken.

Michael weighed-in this morning and had gained 1 pound.  Great after a week of vacation.  I weighed-in this morning and had gained 6 pounds.  6 pounds!  How can a person gain that much in one week?  We ate the same food.  I exercised.  It didn’t matter.

I was horrified and promptly went for a run.  Then I re-weighed.  The gain reduced to 5 pounds.  It’s entirely inconceivable and depressing.

I refuse to record that weight. 

• Week 11: Bye, due to heavy denial.
• Week 10: –0.8 lbs
• Week 9: –1.0 lbs
• Week 8: –1.2 lbs
• Week 7: –0.4 lbs
• Week 6: –0.6 lbs
• Week 5: –1.2 lbs
• Week 4: –3.6 lbs
• Week 3: +0.8 lbs
• Week 2: –1.8 lbs
• Week 1: –2.2 lbs

Total weight loss: 12.0 lbs  (Technically only 7 but we’re not talking about it.)

I sure hope it’s just water retention.  Heaven help me.